Pastor Mark
Mikels – October 29, 2006
“WE LET EACH
OTHER OFF THE HOOK!”
Church Under Construction – Relational Phase #6
Intro … It’s a wonderful and yet scary thing to be part of a
relationship … It’s wonderful because we know we don’t have to “go it
alone” and it’s scary for the very same reason – we’re not allowed to
just “go it alone” – to just “do our own thing” – to be responsible
solely for ourselves and to have to worry about no one but ourselves.
We are connected to others – we’re in a relationship – and that can
bring both delight and distress, both joy and pain.
Way back in the beginning God Himself announced that “It is not good
for man to be alone”. Man alone eventually gets lonely … man alone
eventually gets frustrated because man was not designed to function as
a solitary unit – Man was designed as a relational being and is most
fully man when he expresses himself in genuine, human relationships.
Sin, of course, has majorly bugged man’s basic operating system and no
where has the system crashed any more dramatically than in the area of
relationships.
Just read the headlines … at the heart of every tragic human event is
some type of relational malfunction. People can’t get along and as a
result things go tragically wrong.
Now in the midst of all of this relational meltdown and the resulting
“fall-out” that it creates, we find a singular institution that stands
apart from all the rest.
It’s a place where people are devoted to each other, where they
genuinely love each other, where they continually encourage one
another, where they consciously build up each other, where they trust
each other enough to even confess their sins to each other!
It’s a place like no other … it’s a place that causes those on the
outside to seek admission … it’s a place that by its very existence
causes people to believe that there can be more to life than just
existing.
It’s an awesome place … it’s been called by some of its people, “the
happiest place on earth … and no, it’s not Disneyland, that place of
temporary delight – It’s the Church of Jesus Christ!
The Church of Jesus Christ contains within it the means to counter-act
every fallen human impulse … through the power of its Gospel, it
completely transforms the sinful human heart and creates a fellowship
of born-again believers that rises far above the world around it.
It’s this incredible Church of Jesus Christ that is being constructed
in our midst – Christ is shaping and fitting us into an awesome family
of faith – he is building us into a fully functional relational body
composed of people who are devoted to one another, who are lovingly
committed to one another, who continually encourage one another, who
consciously seek to build up one anther and who trust each other enough
to even confess their sins – admit their failures – to one another.
We haven’t just stumbled onto these things … Christ has instructed
us, directed us even, in His Word concerning the type of life that He
wants us to enjoy together in this incredible relationship called the
“Family of God” – the Church of Jesus Christ.
Today we come to Biblical Relational Directive #6 …
Biblical Relational Directive #6 … “FORGIVE one another” – Ephesians
4:32b
“Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along
with every form of malice.
Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other …”
The Apostle Paul is saying that “things in the church are different
than things in the world” … Here in the Church we do not hold grudges
against those who have in some way hurt us or offended us.
Here in the Church of Jesus Christ we do not seek revenge upon our
fellow believers for things
they either intentionally or unintentionally do … Here in the Church
of Jesus Christ we practice forgiveness. We “let each other off the
hook”.
You see, Paul knew, even as the Christ who inspired him knew, the truth
of Today’s Key Thot …
Key Thot …
FORGIVENESS is a key to the SUCCESS of any long-term RELATIONSHIP.
Without forgiveness, the Church of Jesus Christ would not survive, let
alone thrive, for inevitably, “whenever two or three gather together,
someone will spill his milk” – someone will mess up and cause some
degree of distress to the others.
And when that happens and when it happens enough, some of those others
will be tempted to retaliate in some way …
“Throw him out, take away his milk privileges, make him
lick up every drop, teach him a lesson he’ll never forget!”
And in the expression of those negative, vengeful judgments, the “happy
place” called the Church of Jesus Christ takes a terrible turn.
For our Church to survive, let alone thrive, God wisely says,
“We must practice forgiveness … Forgive One Another”.
Don’t hold grudges against one another, don’t allow yesterday’s actions
to ruin today’s attitudes …
Don’t allow your heart to fill with resentment or bitterness because of
the way someone has treated you. Practice forgiveness …
Allow forgiveness to guard you from bitterness!
So then, as we would seek to heed God’s Directive, consider with me …
THREE KEY QUESTIONS CONCERNING FORGIVENESS …
1. What Is Our MODEL For Forgiveness?
“GOD’S forgiveness in CHRIST”
(Ephesians 4:32bc)
Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what
is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may
benefit those who listen. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God,
with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Get rid of all
bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form
of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each
other, just as in Christ God forgave you.
Be imitators of God, therefore, as (His) dearly loved children …
(Ephesians 4:29-5:1)
It’s one of the greatest feelings in the world to be “Let off the
Hook”, isn’t it? To have really blown it in some way, perhaps to have
failed someone in some important matter and to have them say,
“Forget about it – it’s okay and you’re still okay in my book”.
That’s what God has done for us in Christ …
He has said (in essence) to every repentant sinner who has ever come on
his knees to him …
“Forget about it … I’ve taken care of it in Christ.
Accept what I’ve done for you and you’ll be fine.”
It’s almost impossible to experience that kind of ultimate forgiveness
and not become a forgiving person yourself. I say, “It’s almost
impossible” for some Christians do manage to pull it off.
Even though they have received God’s eternal forgiveness in Christ,
they find (on certain occasions) a less than forgiving spirit within
them.
And for them this next question becomes a relevant one …
2. What Is The CONSEQUENCE If We REFUSE to Forgive?
“GOD will not FORGIVE us!” – (Matthew 6:15)
For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father
will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your
Father will not forgive your sins. (Matthew 6:14-15)
Now that’s a potent consequence … on the surface it would seem that
our very salvation is riding on our willingness and ability to forgive.
However, that understanding would lead us into either a kind of “works
righteousness” (I earn my salvation by my demonstration of forgiveness)
or into a “conditional salvation” (Our salvation is only good as long
as we continue to practice forgiveness).
Both of those possible explanations of this passage do damage to the
clear Biblical teaching that “salvation is a gift freely given by God
to those who by faith willingly receive it”.
(Romans 6:23, John 1:12, Ephesians 2:8-9)
I believe a clue to the understanding of this statement of Christ is
tucked away in the passage we read from Ephesians 4 …
Let’s look at it again …
Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what
is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may
benefit those who listen. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God,
with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Get rid of all
bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form
of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each
other, just as in Christ God forgave you.
Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children … (Ephesians
4:29-5:1)
Did you find the hidden clue in that passage – a passage that
identifies many of the things that make forgiveness both necessary and
difficult?
“And do not grieve the Holy Spirit with whom you were sealed for the
day of redemption.”
Though our salvation is secure … we have been sealed – marked –
branded – identified – as God’s own spiritually born children – our
behavior can bring grief to the Holy Spirit who has been placed within
us as our comforter and teacher and enabler and friend.
And there is no behavior that grieves Him any more deeply than our
unforgiving attitude toward one another for an unforgiving attitude
denies the central reality of our faith – that we have been graciously
and completely forgiven of all sin by a loving Heavenly Father.
An unforgiving attitude communicates our lack of understanding and
maybe even a lack of appreciation for what God has done for us! No
wonder such an attitude brings grief to the Holy Spirit.
And here’s the point … when the Holy Spirit is grieved within us,
some significant things change.
Our special fellowship, our comfortable intimacy with Him changes …
We have offended Him – We have grieved Him … His ability to
fellowship with us is compromised for our actions are denying the very
basic upon our fellowship is built … the gracious, freely given
forgiveness that we have received from God.
And so, let me now paraphrase the words of Jesus in the Sermon on the
Mount in light of the additional revelation that we have received
through the Apostle Paul …
“If you do not forgive those who sin against you and allow them to be
restored to your fellowship,
then the Holy Spirit will not forgive you and allow you to be restored
to His Fellowship.”
A break in fellowship with the precious Holy Spirit of God is the
consequence of an unforgiving heart … that’s serious stuff!
So … we have seen that Forgiveness is directed by the Father and that
Forgiveness is essential for continued Fellowship with the Holy Spirit.
But that doesn’t make it any easier to do, does it?
Well, what if I could show you this morning a way to make it easier,
that is, a way to make it necessary less often? Or as we phrase it in
our third and final Key Question …
3. How Can We MINIMIZE The NEED To Forgive?
“BEAR with one another” – Ephesians 4:2
“As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of
the calling you have received. Be completely humble and gentle; be
patient, bearing with one another in love. (Eph. 4:1-2)
“Bear with one another” – “Make allowances for one another” – “Cut each
other some slack” – “Don’t get so easily offended” – “Seek to minister
help and healing rather than criticism and judgment”.
The truth is … our need to forgive is in direct proportion to our
tendency to get offended … those who get easily offended are forever
needing to practice forgiveness for people are offending them all the
time.
So don’t be so quick to feel offended or slighted or betrayed or
disrespected … “Bear with your fellow believers a bit” and see if
your insides don’t churn a bit less.
Paul put this whole message together with these words found in his
letter to the Colossian believers …
“Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe
yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and
patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may
have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all
these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect
unity. Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of
one body you were called to peace. And be thankful …
(Colossians 3:12-15)
Final Thot … FORGIVENESS is a by-product of GRATITUDE and LOVE.